(1) Cellphones (Mobile phones in the UK) are really MICROWAVE transmitters which send out the same kind of waves that cook your dinner. Some people believe that spending too much time on your mobile can warm up - or even start to cook your brain, though this has not been totally proven.
(2) Cellphones work by linking up with a network of cells, called 'Base Stations'. Each of these contains very complex digital technology to process, transfer & route your call. There are tens of thousands of these in the UK alone!
(3) The further your cellphone is from a Base Station - the more microwave power it puts out when you're in a call. More microwave power drains your battery more quickly, and may be more damaging to health. Powerful Base Stations in crowded areas have been linked with cancer & leukemia in children, but this is not fully proven.
(4) Some cellphone masts are disguised as trees, lamp-posts, flag poles or advertising signs - and can look quite convincing!
(5) Your cellphone constantly 'talks' to all the Base Stations in its range. It lets them know where it is - and where it's moving to. This enables your call to be passed from mast to mast, seamlessly. However...
(6) ... this means that your cellphone can be tracked & traced whenever it is switched on. The Network can locate your position sometimes within 5 METERS of accuracy. This means that if you're carrying a cellphone, and it's switched on - the authorities know exactly where you've been, where you are - and where you're heading! Your cellphone can literally be used as a TRACKING DEVICE!
(7) If asked to do so, network providers like AT&T, Rogers or Vodafone can open up the microphone on your cellphone, enabling anny background sounds or conversations to be recorded. This can be done very simpy - and works as long as your phone is on. Some phones can even be switched on remotely, but most can't. Your cellphone can be made to ACT AS A BUG!
(8) In the UK, ALL cellphone calls, text messages & handset locations are logged by the govenment - and details are kept on record for up to SEVEN YEARS!
(9) In 2011, ALL non-3G cellphones will stop working in most of Europe & the UK, when old-style transmitters are switched off, to make way for new technologies.
(10) There are more cellphones in use in the UK than there are people!
Now you're an expert on cellphones!
One of those surreal kind of days, quite removed from reality in some ways.
Started at wake-up, when I was totally convinced it was Saturday morning, so I lazily remained in bed, noting brilliant sun outside whilst planning a leisurely breakfast, perhaps at IKEA, or the caravan club over in Sully. The noise of the garbage truck passing by jolted a few brain cells into action and was slightly disturbing - the garbage truck comes on Tuesday, NOT Saturday! Has the council gone mad? Or was it me?
It WAS me - it was in fact Tuesday, and I was late. After realizing I'd lost the coffee, and the plot as well, I threw on suit number 3 and shirt number 7, finding the coffee in the freezer in the process.Too late for a cup anyway - just time to fire up the Skoda!
Arriving at The Hub, miraculously on time, I proceded to acquire a crispy breakfast roll, essential for generating energy & indeed the will to live. I'm always left alone whilst eating > I have been known to confuse colleagues, and even Weevils for food whilst in feeding mode. I am therefore guaranteed not to be disturbed whilst in possession of bacon, which is a good thing for all concerned.
The rest of the day moved on fairly quickly, as ever, problems to solve, people to see, important things to do - and countless people telling me to do things which are, of course more important. Manic emails from the Boss with more, even more vital things to do, and even sooner, and a load of things to plan, for yesterday.
Lunch was disappointing - grey meatballs, allegedly made of pork, but more likely to be cotton wool, soaked in barbecue sauce. Then there was the soggetti - like spaghetti, but flaccid, limpid and totally flavorless. Quite horrible, and an altogether unpleasant experience. I was then offered an alien delicacy to sample. It resembled cheese - with an aftertaste of Marmite, or perhaps Bovril. It was something I'll never forget. I may have been psychologically damaged by it.
Every Tuesday ends in blah blah... the meeting that reduces the brain to pudding, and makes suicide by shark seem, by comparison, a pleasurable experience, one even to look forward to. As ever, half a rainforest is passed round the table, all to be filed in the bin immediately afterwards, of course unread.
After the first few minutes, someone says it's cold - so the air con goes off. It's actually baking, and within seconds, the room is so hot, that the fruit visibly shrivels, and later - even steel objects vaporise, and the fiery atmosphere draws everyone into dessicated unconsciousness.
At last, proof that God exists, as papers start to shuffle, the PowerPoint is switched off, and people start to move to the door. It really is a miracle... we're finishing TWENTY MINUTES EARLY!! Huzzah!!
Then Bigmouth opens it, and it all kicks off again. Another 45 minutes of pointless misery talking about trivia, and people sink back into their seats, forlorn.
Now I'm home - had Morrison's self-service salad and chili flavored pilchards for tea, & now it's time for New Tricks!
Awesome!!
xxNite!
Well, to be honest, last night was pretty depressing, with Wales losing to France and therefore being denied a Grand Slam, but at least on the positive side, it was a good, tense game - and more importantly, it was France... not England who snatched it from us!
Woke up feeling about as uninspired as an aphid about to enter a ladybird colony, and with not a lot planned. Hanging heavily at the back - and front of my mind was 6,500 tonnes of work I have to get sorted sometime before Monday, and a total lack of willpower to get started on the task. No doubt, Sunday will be fun!
Was lying kinda comatose on the couch, making perpetualy mental excuses not to go out, and the phone rang. A couple of friends were coming into Cardiff - and offered a meet up & lunch. Within minutes - another call, and another offer of a trip into CF. So, Saturday sorted - I found some clothes, threw them on, and headed for the rail station @ Queen Street.
Walking down Queen Street, our main shopping street, was a surreal experience. Crossing the road by the traffic lights, I encountered a group of pirates in full gear - one with a massive cutlass, another with an IKEA stuffed blue parrot. The group descended upon a nearby cashpoint and raided it mercilessly, I think, of eighty quid! All were given massive hi-fives largely by passing emos, who seem to like pirates. Must check up on that one!
Further down the street, I became aware of crazy violin music. I quickly discovered this was coming from a violin - being played by an American, walking a tightrope slung between two trees. A large crowd gathered as he fiddled & walked away, cracking passable jokes as he did so! After watching for a few minutes & taking in the atmoshere & sheer oddness, I continued down the street to discover...
... a chalk circle with pentagrams & mystic signs and four FIRE EATERS swallowing flames and blowing them out, like hyperactive dragons at a fire-fest. I wondered what fire must taste like - and thought probably somewhere between an over-spiced vindaloo curry and cooking oil. The show was pretty spectacular, the crowd wee impressed - as were the film crew that appeared to be reccording the event!
Walking on, and past the pirates again, I encounterd a band playing classic rock tracks very admirably. Thee guys were into their 50's, but drew the biggest crowds of all. Lots of Floyd, Focus, Dire Straits, etc... powerful sound.. very good... had to linger for quite a while!
Moving past the living, breathing, moving statue (Malcolm) - as always, totally white and dressed like Mozart, I noticed he was more animated than usual, jumping off his box several times, runniing into the assembled crowd and terrifying a number of small children - possibly to the stage of terminal heart failure, or at least an urgent change of pants!
At this point I noticed that about 85% of the living, breathing population - ie, those without zimmer frames & blue rinses, were either emo, indie, metalheads, skater or generally rockers of some other related style. It appeared that chavs and even townies were becoming extinct, and this really was a lift! Suprise too, didn't realize how far styles & culture had moved over here, and at such a fast pace. Too many silly gnome hats though - what's that all about?
Finally, to the brand new Wagamama - a Japanese 'fast food' style restaurant in the heart of the newly-developed Hayes area. Totally packed and very tasteful - complete with pirates(!) and 100% emo waiters who thankfully helped us make sense of the menu! I had a hot chicken curry'ish kind of thing with sticky rice & some skewer things which were HOT and supremely delicious.
An awesome eating experience, and great eye-candy too.
Now I'm at home, impossibly tired & enjoying a 'medicinal' Southern Comfort!
Nite! xx
