Chased by the waves... and an adder!

Caswell Bay, great place to surf when conditions are right, but a rocky area means you have to be careful when you're coming in!

Fantastic day yesterday, started pretty miserable with me in the midst of a fog of indecision. Got into the 'another cup of coffee' mode... and nothing was gonna happen. Managed to galvanize myself into action after the weather forecast said it was sunny and warm in Swansea.

I also had a total desire for a Joe's Ice Cream: and the best ice cream parlor in the world is in Mumbles! The £2.60 are best - but due to the diet, the £1.60 would have to do today! With Swansea decided as the venue, what to take! Swansea = Ice Cream (so need wallet!) + waves (take surfboard or body board? (not sure > a lot of hassle)... Wetsuit - Long or short, summer or winter? I have several - sadly all of them at the end of their active lives. sad, eh?

You need a wetsuit all year round in the UK, unless June / july has been particularly hot. Even now, you can get away with a long'summer' suit - one which is about 3mm thick & which covers all your arms & legs too.

Decided to take the big board & the long, thinner suit, but was only about 20% sure of action. It's not that warm, and in this weather, the sea is normally pretty flat. Still, the idea of getting there without kit, and suddenly wanting to take part would have been pretty frustrating, so better prepared than not!

So, arrived at Swansea - Mumbles was the first stop, as ever for joe's Ice Cream - and a coffee. Felt a bit extravagant, so had it topped with nuts today (the icecream, not the coffee!)

Mumbles was crowded, so I moved onto Caswell Bay, a fantastic bay surrounded by hills & heather. The weather was great, but the sea was pretty flat, and not much happening. About three surfers, a couple on bodyboards & a few kids swimming & just splashing about. Wished I'd brought the body board, but that's how it goes.

Caswell Bay - on a good day. sadly, today was as flat as a frenchman's humor.

Not sure I'd do much, but I parked up & got changed anyway. Hate that part of things... Grr! A local guy told me things would 'look up' in about an hour, so, motivated, I left the board in the car & walked to a grassy area to watch & wait... I noticed a hideous black beetle crawl across my foot. I hate them: thank god I was wearing a suit! I grabbed a rock, flicked it away... then crushed it. It was hideous, after all.

Just when getting ready to sit back down, out of the blue - or more precisely, the gorse, AN ADDER RUSHES OUT! Four feet long, evil & hissing, its fangs were bared as it leapt for my throat(*). I screamed in terror and panic - then ran faster than I thought possible. Took over an hour for my heart to return to normal... and I screamed so loud, these guys thought I was being murdered & came over to see if I was still alive!

The adder... (*) In reality, about 18 inches long. It ran for its life too when it saw me!

Drama over, I noticed a few pathetic mini-waves as the tide limped in. Grabbed my board, ran in & did virtually nothing for three hours apart from paddle, swim & float. I'm not at all an expert - I can just do the basics when conditions allow me to. I just enjoy it, so I do it.

At one point, things were ALMOST spoiled when this bloke I was talking to told me that GREAT WHITE SHARKS had been seen 3 miles off Caswell Bay last summer.. but I had no intention of going 100m out, let alone 5km!

A friendly great white. They have been seen off the English south west coast, and out to sea off South West Wales.

I then went home... and slept, after a relaxing Bulmers' Pear!

A random cheerful-looking guy.

Holidays... End of!!

Always sad when holidays come to an end, but always best to think of the bad bits just to make returning to work seem vaguely possible! 

For me, attack by ferocious animals has been the theme of the fortnight... the rampage of the pecking swans, the charge of the alien (Canadian!) geese, the savage assault by pouncing adder whiich tried to tear me out of my wetsuit, the murderous stalking by a slathering wolf, and of course, the attack of a thousand mouthparts from the canniballistic vampire gnats which ate me alive & bled me dry!

Then there was the letter from O2 & the incandescent row which followed > some of you will have been able to read about that nasty business (I won though!) and of course, the almost lethal attack by SatNav, which almost led me & the skoda into the quicksands of total despair!

Bad things over... I now feel ready for tomorrow (erm.. if I convince myself whilst under the influence of pentathol).. Great week, all in all!

Surfing in Gower - great fun, but totally tiring, mile after mile of walks in brilliant sunshine, catching up with friends in Suffolk, loads of barbecues - and the diet, which at ten days, is not nearly as miserable as I thought it would be. The ounces are just falling off!

 

Even  caught up with a couple of friends who I'd not heard from for a while, so there's something else good which happened!

The Doctor Who special was a breath of fresh air which dispelled the gloomy stagnation of most TV, and Ashes to Ashes is back on Monday. It'll be awesome to have the Gene Genie back on our screens, that IS a fact!
 

OK.. now I've convinced myself life is positive... let's fire up the steam iron & let's flatten those shirts!

(Cries uncontrollably!)

Off into Swansea!

Had a fairly late night, doing very little & achieving even less. Got involved in a discussion with a guy called Colin about a show on Channel 4 which looked at surgical correction of 'embarrassing' body parts. One was a woman who had shark-like pins for teeth > looked alien, and nasty, she was given porcelain veneers; the others included an incontinent man, who ended up being fitted up with a mechanical bladder with the 'ON' switch in his scrotum... but you'll have to imaging the rest! Was it smut - or medical interest? Dunno!

Was scratched also by a Weevil* right across the hand - that's gone all red now, think I've been infected & may mutate at some point into something horriffic, but maybe no one will notice any difference!

Amazingly, looking out of the window, no sign of the rain, blizzards, storm force winds, hell & dalmations we were promised today, just a blue sky & calmness. I've decided to fire up the Skoda and head for Swansea. If I don't do anything, it'll be daytime TV, my couch, the laptop & about 15 liters of instant coffee - neither good nor inspiring!

The plan therefore is to get diesel, only 20 miles left, close one coming back from Stafford yesterday, drive straight to Mumbles for a compulsory Joe's Ice Cream (try them if you get to Swansea - they're awesome & addictive! or just have a look - http://www.joes-icecream.com/ ) and then to drive round to Caswell Bay to watch surfers - always a good thing to do. If things look good - the plan would then be to go to Rhossili, bit of a drive, but well worth it.

Always a good place to be, with miles of flat, golden sands & steep hills with fantastic vantage points. It's always been my favorite place to surf, so may even be tempted to have a go, in a half-hearted, non serious kind of way, but could just end up spectating. There's normally a lot to see! The one problem with Rhossili is that to get from your car to the bay is about half a mile down a steep slope, and it's a long way to carry your board, and there are brambles!

Still, when you get there - the bay is beautiful, the waves are safe & there's nothing nasty, like rips or sewage! There is the danger of being landed on by a passing hang-glider or microlight, as they get here too - and can be fun to watch!

Then it'll be an early tea at the Worm's Head Inn & a gradual return to Cardiff, stopping in a few places on the way. Day planned > time to move! I'll upload any interesting pix as I find  them!

[* For 'weevil', read 'next door's ferocious cat, which HATES me!]

Surviving the chavs in Barry!

Off to Barry > a seaside town about 8km from here. It's an interesting place with good parts, and some horrible ones! Here's my guide to enjoyment... and survival on your day trip!

 

It's divided into three parts: The Town, which is run down & chav infested, and characterized by vile, aggressive, baggy, ill-fitting tracksuits & faded Burberry baseball caps. They're often drunk - and frequently cause problems, vandalism, fights, etc. Hideous, and smelly too. All the shops - those that remain open - have bars and shutters protecting their windows, and at night, it's a place very definitely to avoid - especially if you're not an obvious chav.

 


Barry Island is much more pleasant - with lots of walks, fantastic beaches and very much what you'd expect in a small seaside town. sadly, there are those awful places called 'amusements', where nothing even vaguely amusing has ever been known to happen. They should be closed IMMEDIATELY under the terms of the Trades Descriptions Act!

There ARE chavs here too, but there's usually so many other people around that even if you look a bit 'alternative', you're fairly safe, especially if you keep a low profile. The ones in the picture smelt of a strange mix of Lynx Africa, Special Brew, stale tobacco & dried urine. Interesting...

You can still get lunches for £2.99 & cups of tea for 50p, though I did once get full scale food poisoning after risking a cheap Sunday roast. Mistake.

 

Then, there are the properly nice places - The Knapp, an isolated cove used by surfers & windsurfers, often when the sea is quite wild. It can actually get quite packed when the wind's up, and the sea is rough - and there are several rescues each year. There are no chavs by day, but they are rumored to gather in cars at night. Watch out for pecking swans: they sit on the lake and can be FEROCIOUS.


There's a headland, rather like Sand Point over in Weston-s-Mare (England) and lots of parks, suitable for families & small children. Romilly Park is probably the best. There are cliffs for the more energetic, and an ice cream van which also sells hot dogs!

Time to fire up the Skoda.. I'm off!

Easter Friday & Stuff..

Looking forward to Doctor Who's Easter special - Saturday on BBC1 in the UK, though my network of international spies tell me that many of you will be downloading it for viewing all over the world! Certainly, the trailer looks good, and the 'buzz' over at Pontypool is that it's a 'cracker' - and a big improvement on the rather disappointing Christmas special. Can't wait!

Great to see that Gene Hunt is back in Ashes to Ashes, series 2 staring on BBC1 in the UK on Monday, 20th April, though no doubt it will be uploaded illegally for international enjoyment (heaven forbid, lol!) pretty soon afterwards. This will be the last series of Ashes, though the writers have not written off the prospect of a further Gene Hunt spin off, perhaps set 5 years later, and with another 'time traveller' in place. Was not convinced by the current one - Sam Tyler definitely rules!!

Had a great day looking at birds. Unusual for me, perhaps, but swans, mallards, coots and other unidentifiable water fowl do have their charms, especially when set against the glorious backdrop of Cardiff Bay's glorious, and largely undiscovered Wetlands, and when accompanied by glorious weather and an invigorating spring breeze! God, this sounds like a report written for Croeso / Bwrdd Cymru!

There's a lot of pix gone up in an entire new album - worth a look if you're into Cardiff, travel - or perhaps if you intend coming here some time. Comments are always welcome. Not sure of the quality today - think the Sony-Ericsson needs a restore or something!

Ten things you (probably!) didn't know about cellphones!

(1) Cellphones (Mobile phones in the UK) are really MICROWAVE transmitters which send out the same kind of waves that cook your dinner. Some people believe that spending too much time on your mobile can warm up - or even start to cook your brain, though this has not been totally proven.
                                    
(2) Cellphones work by linking up with a network of cells, called 'Base Stations'. Each of these contains very complex digital technology to process, transfer & route your call. There are tens of thousands of these in the UK alone!

(3) The further your cellphone is from a Base Station - the more microwave power it puts out when you're in a call. More microwave power drains your battery more quickly, and may be more damaging to health. Powerful Base Stations in crowded areas have been linked with cancer & leukemia in children, but this is not fully proven.

(4) Some cellphone masts are disguised as trees, lamp-posts, flag poles or advertising signs - and can look quite convincing!

(5) Your cellphone constantly 'talks' to all the Base Stations in its range. It lets them know where it is - and where it's moving to. This enables your call to be passed from mast to mast, seamlessly. However...

(6) ... this means that your cellphone can be tracked & traced whenever it is switched on. The Network can locate your position sometimes within 5 METERS of accuracy. This means that if you're carrying a cellphone, and it's switched on - the authorities know exactly where you've been, where you are - and where you're heading! Your cellphone can literally be used as a TRACKING DEVICE!

(7) If asked to do so, network providers like AT&T, Rogers or Vodafone can open up the microphone on your cellphone, enabling anny background sounds or conversations to be recorded. This can be done very simpy - and works as long as your phone is on. Some phones can even be switched on remotely, but most can't. Your cellphone can be made to ACT AS A BUG!

(8) In the UK, ALL cellphone calls, text messages & handset locations are logged by the govenment - and details are kept on record for up to SEVEN YEARS!

(9) In 2011, ALL non-3G cellphones will stop working in most of Europe & the UK, when old-style transmitters are switched off, to make way for new technologies.

(10) There are more cellphones in use in the UK than there are people!

Now you're an expert on cellphones!

An ordinary sort of day?

One of those surreal kind of days, quite removed from reality in some ways.


Started at wake-up, when I was totally convinced it was Saturday morning, so I lazily remained in bed, noting brilliant sun outside whilst planning a leisurely breakfast, perhaps at IKEA, or the caravan club over in Sully. The noise of the garbage truck passing by jolted a few brain cells into action and was slightly disturbing - the garbage truck comes on Tuesday, NOT Saturday! Has the council gone mad? Or was it me?

It WAS me - it was in fact Tuesday, and I was late. After realizing I'd lost the coffee, and the plot as well, I threw on suit number 3 and shirt number 7, finding the coffee in the freezer in the process.Too late for a cup anyway - just time to fire up the Skoda!

Arriving at The Hub, miraculously on time, I proceded to acquire a crispy breakfast roll, essential for generating energy & indeed the will to live. I'm always left alone whilst eating > I have been known to confuse colleagues, and even Weevils for food whilst in feeding mode. I am therefore guaranteed not to be disturbed whilst in possession of bacon, which is a good thing for all concerned.

The rest of the day moved on fairly quickly, as ever, problems to solve, people to see, important things to do - and countless people telling me to do things which are, of course more important. Manic emails from the Boss with more, even more vital things to do, and even sooner, and a load of things to plan, for yesterday.

Lunch was disappointing - grey meatballs, allegedly made of pork, but more likely to be cotton wool, soaked in barbecue sauce. Then there was the soggetti - like spaghetti, but flaccid, limpid and totally flavorless. Quite horrible, and an altogether unpleasant experience. I was then offered an alien delicacy to sample. It resembled cheese - with an aftertaste of Marmite, or perhaps Bovril. It was something I'll never forget. I may have been psychologically damaged by it.

Every Tuesday ends in blah blah... the meeting that reduces the brain to pudding, and makes suicide by shark seem, by comparison, a pleasurable experience, one even to look forward to. As ever, half a rainforest is passed round the table, all to be filed in the bin immediately afterwards, of course unread.

After the first few minutes, someone says it's cold - so the air con goes off. It's actually baking, and within seconds, the room is so hot, that the fruit visibly shrivels, and later - even steel objects vaporise, and the fiery atmosphere draws everyone into dessicated unconsciousness.

At last, proof that God exists, as papers start to shuffle, the PowerPoint is switched off, and people start to move to the door. It really is a miracle... we're finishing TWENTY MINUTES EARLY!! Huzzah!!

Then Bigmouth opens it, and it all kicks off again. Another 45 minutes of pointless misery talking about trivia, and people sink back into their seats, forlorn.

Now I'm home - had Morrison's self-service salad and chili flavored pilchards for tea, & now it's time for New Tricks!



Awesome!!
xxNite!